Archive for Health & Beauty


Jennifer, if you are going to share a piece of twinkie-like food with another person then make sure that if you want to smell it first then be sure to sniff it at least a millimeter or two away from your nostrils.

I mean that’s just plain sanitary and common sense, honey!

But for the love of god “Girl on Fire” don’t put your microscopic boogery, snotty and liquid makeupy nasty-ass nostrils on a twinkie-like food then sniff the hell out of it then break it in half and offer fellow actor, Liam Hemsworth a piece of it to eat.

P.S.    For those of you out there who are wondering what the hell i’m talking about either rent or Netflix the movie, The Hunger Games.  This nasty-ass scene featuring Jennifer Lawrence and Liam Hemsworth happens very early in the movie, like within the first 15 minutes.

Now that you are properly schooled I will continue with the blog post.

I mean “Girl on Fire” it’s okay if YOU want to chow down on your own microscopic boogery, snotty and liquid makeupy nasty-ass twinkie-like food infested with your germs because after all it did come from your own body.  Although I don’t know why the hell you would want to but that’s your affair.

But for the love of God “Girl on Fire” be humane and not involve poor Liam Hemsworth in your unsanitary ways!  Girl, have a damn heart!  That poor young man has been through enough!   “Girl on Fire” have you never heard of Liam’s ex, a girl named Miley Cyrus and her vaginal germ infested foam finger?

I mean “Girl on Fire” sometimes you can be so cold-hearted and cold-blooded!

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Recently actress, Angelina Jolie has come out to the public about having a preventive double mastectomy after learning that she carries a mutation of the BRCA1 gene which sharply increases her risk of developing breast cancer and ovarian cancer.

In my opinion, I think that she did a wonderful thing!

Because of her worldwide celebrity and her being a mother to many children, I have noticed that more women are not only talking about this uncomfortable and serious subject but they are also doing more research on the BRCA1 gene and learning that they have early options.  And Angelina Jolie should be applauded for this.  And so many individuals have been doing just that including many celebrities and bloggers.


I have also noticed something else since Angelina Jolie recently came out and that something is hypocrisy.

Just a few years ago, some of the same bloggers and celebrities who are currently singing Angelina’s praises like she is the most perfect human being on earth were also trashing the hell out of her then nasty-ass for not only committing adultery with then very married mega-stud movie actor, Brad Pitt while filming the movie, Mr. and Mrs. Smith but for also not coming clean and telling the truth to the world that they actually had an affair and for not apologizing to Miss Apple Pie America, Jennifer Aniston, Pitt’s former wife.

(P.S.    Hey Angelina and Brad, couldn’t you two at least have take a tattered musty-ass page out of the LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibrian adultery playbook and apologize and keep talking and singing songs about your affair until people are so fed up with hearing you talk and write songs about your affair that they literally want to blow their brains out at the mere mention of it?)

Anyhoo, back to the uncomfortable issue at hand which is:

When a celebrity gets cancer or any other potentially bad or fatal disease does this wipe out or grant them a free pass for all of the shitty things that they have done in the past? (i.e.    In Angelina Jolie’s case, having a sexual affair with a married man.)

Hmmm, just wondering.

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Last week in addition to checking out two books at the Dover Public Library I also checked out a couple of dvd’s too.  Yesterday night as the third consecutive winter snowstorm to hit on a Sunday was in full swing I decided to watch one of the dvd’s that I rented from the library.  I was in the mood for a light movie considering the serious snowstorm going on outside so I put in the movie, DodgeBall.

For the most part I thought that it was a decent comedy and a fun takeoff on dodgeball. BUT approximately twenty minutes before the movie ended I got an unexpected shock when then squeaky clean superstar athlete, Lance Armstrong shows up as himself and gives actor, Vince Vaughn‘s character, Peter LaFleur, an inspirational pep talk when Vaughn tells Armstrong that he’s decided to quit the dodgeball tournament. Below are some of Lance Armstrong’s encouraging words to Vince Vaughn from the movie:

“You know once I was thinking about quitting bicycling when I was diagnosed with brain, lung and testicular cancer all at the same time but with the love and support of my friends and family I got back on the bike and won the Tour DeFrance five times in a row and i’m sure that you have a good reason for quitting. So what are you dying from that’s keeping you from the tournament finals? Well, I guess if a person never quit when the going got tough they wouldn’t have anything to regret for the rest of their lives. Good luck to you, Peter, i’m sure your decision won’t haunt you forever.”

People, talk about awkward!

I was literally in my own home physically cringing at Lance Armstrong’s words because I feel so disappointed in him because I was such a big fan of his and ever since he came out on Oprah as a drug abusing cheater I have avoided all media regarding him so it was an extreme shock to see him in the movie, DodgeBall, the last place on earth that I would ever expect to see him.

And people, I also received a second shock after doing some long hard thinking later that night when coming to the conclusion that I probably wouldn’t have even rented the dvd if I had known that Lance Armstrong was going to be in it. And that kind of pissed me off because the other actors in the movie didn’t do anything wrong and illegal like Lance Armstrong and why should they have to suffer because of his mistakes. That’s not fair, that’s not right.

Jeez, what an awkward situation!

I mean some of those encouraging words that Lance was saying to Vince Vaughn in the movie back in 2004 actually had me gasping in disbelief because let’s face it, the probable reason for Lance Armstrong’s brain, lung and testicular cancer was from all of those illegal performance enhancing drugs he did to keep winning the Tour DeFrance.

And people when Lance Armstrong also said to Vince Vaughn in the movie, “I’m sure your decision won’t haunt you forever!” I almost lost it because that has been a constant question on my mind ever since Lance Armstrong finally came clean to Oprah. Does Lance really regret doping? Does he really regret all of the heartache that he caused his wonderful charity, Live Strong, his fans, his family, his friends? Was doping really worth it in the long run now that he has been permanently banned from the cycling world and so many people out there think that he’s trash not worthy enough to be picked up? How come when the going got tough for him why couldn’t he have done the right thing and not taken illegal performance enhancing drugs?

I’ll tell ya’ people, these thoughts were not what I would ever expect to be thinking after viewing a movie called, DodgeBall.

This awkward situation reminded me of a similar situation that happened several years ago. Unfortunately on that night I couldn’t sleep so I turned on the tv and started channel surfing to see if there was anything good on. I eventually landed on the movie, The Naked Gun only to quickly switch the channel a couple of minutes later when O.J. Simpson‘s mug came onto my boob tube for obvious reasons.

I said it before and i’ll say it again, awkward!

P.S. I hate awkward movie moments and fallen superstar athletes!

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Going back to school for teenagers can be very difficult but for teens with acne it can be devastating. A couple of bumps on the face can truly be a teenager’s worst nightmare in the image conscious world of high school. It is said that in the United States over 20 million teens have acne and 100 million dollars is spent every year on over-the-counter acne medications. I know that this isn’t a cure for acne but I hope it helps because I also had acne when I was a teenager and I swore that one day I would do something to help other teens with acne. Here is my contribution. In this series of articles, I am going to make helpful suggestions on a variety of ways to make going back to school for teens with acne a more pleasant experience.

Tip 1: Start a Stand-Up Comedy Group for Teens with Acne

When most people think of stand-up comedy, they picture a famous comic like Eddie Murphy, Jerry Seinfeld or Dave Chappelle telling jokes and performing comedy routines up on a stage in a huge auditorium filled with thousands of laughing people.
But stand-up comedy doesn’t have to be that formal. ANYONE can perform stand-up comedy and that includes teenagers! Age doesn’t matter. And you don’t need to have a thousand-plus audience either! All you really need is one other person to give you constructive feedback. Stand-up comedy can be performed anywhere. Teens can perform in their living rooms, in their backyards, at a local park, etc. For teenagers there are so many wonderful benefits to performing stand-up comedy including making new friends, getting support from their peers, it’s a fun and healthy way to boost self esteem, it can help to overcome shyness, improves public speaking skills, it can toughen a person up and make accepting criticism a little bit easier and it can bring much needed laughter into a teenager with acne’s life.


First, find a place to have your group. Teens, ask anyone with decent space and a bathroom. Consider asking a dermatologist if you can use their office, a teacher if you can use one of the classrooms, a parent if you can use their basement, etc. Be creative, don’t give up! Trust me, since this is for a good cause you will definitely find an adult willing to help you out. Always remember that adults used to be teenagers too and some of them had acne as well. Many of them remember what it was like to have acne and would really like to help you out. So have patience, you WILL find a place to have the group.

Once you find a place to have your group, it’s time to put the word out and let other teenagers with acne know about the group. Good places to start are at your school, local teen websites, concert halls, drug stores, fast food restaurants, the mall, etc. The best place to start is with your dermatologist. Most teenagers who have acne usually see a dermatologist from time to time. Ask your dermatologist if you can put up a few flyers informing teens about the stand-up comedy group for teens with acne. Remember to keep the wording on the flyer short and simple. Write in
big and bold letters.
Example: “Are You A Teenager With Acne? Do You Want To Make New Friends And Have Lots Of Fun? Well, Join The Stand-Up Comedy Group For Teens With Acne Today! No Experience Required! For More Info, Call___ Or Send An Email To ___.”
Be sure to leave a contact email address or phone number on each flyer. Next, ask a parent if they can print you off some copies of the flyer at their place of employment or ask a teacher if you can print off some copies of the flyer on the school copier. If those options are not possible, then go to your local printer or the library and print off 10-20 flyers to get you started. Most printers and libraries usually charge 10 cents a copy. So your out of pocket expenses would be one to two dollars. A pretty small price to pay.

Once you start receiving calls and get a couple of teens willing to join the group, arrange an informal party at your meeting place. Ask each teen if they can bring a cheap bag of chips, candy and soda to the party to break the ice and make the atmosphere more festive. At the party decide how long the group should be, what day(s) of the week it should be held on, what time should the group meet, any ground rules, etc. Try to pick times and days convenient for everyone which may be hard, but try anyway. Once all of the arrangements have been made, it’s time to have your first stand-up comedy group.


-Tell jokes.
-Partner up and create comedy skits.
-Play the game, Charades.
-If any of the group members plays an instrument, have them write a comedy song and perform it for the group.
-Have each group member pick out a famous or notorious person and have another group member parody them.
-Talk about your favorite comedians or comedy movies.
-Bring silly toys to the group to discuss with the other group members.
-Create new and hilarious things for the group to do at each meeting to keep it fresh and exciting.
-Spread the word about the group. Remember, word of mouth is the world’s best form of advertising.
-Have lots of fun!
-Laugh your butt off!
-Be daring!
-Give constructive criticism!
-Act your age or act immaturely!
-Allow teenagers with clear skin to join the group too!

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Ladies, here is a list of the top organic and natural make-up companies on the internet that I wrote and compiled in November 2006 for my Associated Content page. Try some of their products and tell me what you think.

1. Global Healing Center ( offers organic make-up, skincare, health products and home health equipment. One of their most popular items is the Organic Shimmer Eye Shadow Cream which comes in many color-coordinating shades. Key Ingredient: Kaolin Clay: Water-proof and absorbs oils secreted from the skin. This ingredient keeps eye shadow from “running”. Price: $13.99 each.

2. MiEssence ( ( offers the world’s first certified organic cosmetics, skincare & healthcare products. One of their most unique products is MiEssence Organic Ambrosia Essense which is a dual toner and moisturizer with eight herbal and flower extracts. Key Ingredients: Organic Tamanu Nut Oil improves the appearance of wounds and healthy skin. Organic Rosehip Seed Oil reduces appearance of scars, facial lines & premature aging. Price: $72.95 on OS.

3. Burt’s Bees ( offers natural cosmetics, haircare, remedies, etc. Stand-out products include Burt’s Bees Concealing Creme which is a concealer that hides under eye circles, skin imperfections and blemishes. It comes in two shades, light and medium. Key Ingredient: Rosemary Extract: This anti-bacterial moisturizing oil is excellent for acne! Price: $9.00.

4. The Organic Make-up Company ( ( offers organic make-up, skincare and wellness products. One of OMC’s best products is their All Natural and Organic Facial Cleansers which come in four varieties. I recommend trying the Palma Rosa & Geranium Face Cleanser. This cleanser is non-drying and gently cleans dirt and make-up. Key Ingredient: Organic Geranium Essential Oil: Helps to relieve nervous tension and in some instances, can help to prevent insomnia. Price: $16.45 on OMC/$13.50 on Amazon.

5. Raesin Images Cosmetics ( offers natural cosmetics, mineral make-up and skincare products. The Raesin Images Colour ID System Liquid Mineral Make-up contains natural skincare ingredients that leave skin nourished and flawless looking. Comes in over 70 shades and 3 foundation formulas. Key Ingredient: Zinc Oxide: Helps to block the ultraviolet rays of the sun. Price: $24.99 for .5 oz bottle.

6. Pur Reflections ( offers pure and natural make-up, skin and body care. Super Hydration D20 Facial Water is a phenominal facial spritzer that soothes and helps to heal and protect skin against dehydration and dryness. Key Ingredient: Shea Butter: Emollient butter that heals wounds, stretch marks, and soothes irritated skin. Price: $17.00.

7. Paul Penders ( offers natural organic skincare products, herbal cosmetics and haircare products. Their “Nutritious color” lip colors are lipsticks that protect and strengthen even the most sensitive lips. Comes in 12 classic colors. Key Ingredient: Ceramides: Helps to maintain moisture levels in the epidermis. Price: $14.50.

8. J.Lynne Cosmetics ( offers mineral make-up and natural skincare products. One of their most interesting products is their Carrot Complexion Natural Handmade Luxury Soap which is a deep-cleansing facial soap made with carrot juice that rehydrates dry, damaged and sensitive skin. Key Ingredient: Beta-Carotene: Excellent antioxident and plays a major role in cancer prevention. Price: $7.50.

9. Aubrey Organics ( offers 100% natural make-up, hair, skin & body care products. To remove all traces of make-up, try Aubrey Organics Herbessence Make-up Remover. It is made from eight herbal oils that wipe away make-up and impurities. It also prepares the skin for cleaning and is safe to use under the delicate eye area. Key Ingredient: Macadamia Nut Oil: Tones aged and dry skin. Price: $6.95.

10. Monave ( offers natural mineral make-up and skincare. Unlike other companies, Monave really addresses the needs of women of color. One of their best products is Monave Eyeliners which are handcrafted with natural plant products. They come in 7 shades. Key Ingredient: Jojoba Oil: Rich in Vitamins A, D, and E. Also provides suppleness and softness to the skin. Price: $11.50.

11. Honeybee Gardens ( offers pure, all-natural cosmetics, bath and body care products. One of their most unique products is their ColorBalm Naturals Lipstick which provides the protection of a lip balm combined with the color of a lipstick. Comes in 20 colors. Key Ingredient: Kukui Nut Oil: Ideal for chapped and rough lips because of it’s emollient and cooling properties. Price: $9.99.

12. Cory Cosmetics ( offers handcrafted mineral cosmetics, natural skincare, bath and body products. One of their stand-out products is Eye Fix-Sation Brow Wax which sets the eyebrows for an all day hold. It comes in a clear shade and six color shades. Key Ingredient: Organic Extract of Black Willow Bark: Soothes headaches and arthritis. Price: $6.99.

13. BareEscentuals ( offers 100% pure and natural mineral make-up and skincare products. For a glowing complexion, try BareEscentuals Cush Foaming Seaweed Cleanser which is a deep-pore cleanser that gently cleans and moisturizes the face. Key Ingredient: Sage Oil: Antimicrobial and stimulating oil that tightens and firms the skin. Price: $20.00.

14. Jane Iredale ( offers natural mineral cosmetics. For a kisser that will make Barbara Hershey’s lips look deflated, try Jane Iredale More Lip – Lip Plumper. This moisturizing plumper will make your lips look fuller without having to resort to painful and expensive Collagen or Restylane
lip injections. Key Ingredient: Ginger Root Extract: Improves blood circulation.
Price: $18.00.

15. Sheer Cover ( ( offers natural mineral-based make-up and skincare. Leeza Gibbons, formerly of the tv show, Entertainment Tonight, sponsors this company. One of Leeza’s picks is the Sheer Cover Base Protector which is a light oil-free make-up base that smooths away visible skin imperfections, enlarged pores and fine lines. Key Ingredient: Cucumber Extract: Has slight bleaching action which aids in removing dead skin cells. Price: $23.50 on HSN.

16. Dr. Hauschka ( offers natural holistic cosmetics, skin, body, and hair care products. One of their most popular products is the Lipliner 01-04 which accentuates and contours the lips. Key Ingredient: Anthyllis Extract: Normalizes oily and dry skin. Price: 16.95.

17. Wei East ( offers natural herbal cosmetics and skincare. Bright Lights Rice Milk Essense provides targeted treatment to blotchy or discolored skin and brightens face by evening out the skin tone. Key Ingredient: Calcium:
Regulates the secretion of various hormones to the body. Price: $58.00.

18. Nvey Le Maquillage ( offers natural, earth-friendly organic cosmetics and bodycare. One of their hottest items is the Organic Compact Powder which contains earth minerals that provide natural coverage while sealing and refreshening foundation. Key Ingredient: Chamomile Extract: Anti-inflammatory extract that calms allergic reactions. Price: 42.00.

19. Arbonne International ( offers natural cosmetics, skincare, weight loss products, etc. To hide fine lines, try Arbonne’s About Face Line Defiance Make-up SPF 8 which is a liquid make-up that smoothes wrinkles. It comes in 15 shades. Key Ingredient: Wheat Germ Oil: Aids in renewing skin cells. Price: $26.00.

20. Ecco Bella ( offers natural and organic skincare, cosmetics, haircare, etc. One of their stand-out items is the “Good For You Gloss” which is a portable lip gloss that comes in 4 gorgeous colors. And for gals on the go, the applicator tube contains a built-in mirror so you can apply it anywhere! Key Ingredient: Organic Palmfruit Stearin: Stabilizes lipgloss and keeps it from melting in the heat. Price: $13.95.

21. Earth’s Beauty ( offers organic/natural cosmetics and skincare. Bisque and Almond were the two top sellers for 2005 for the Mineral Colours Plus SPF Foundation Powder Line. This powder is heavier than regular foundation powder because it conceals and has sunscreen protection. Key Ingredient: Organic Wildcrafted Blend Of Arrowroot: Provides a clear gloss to the skin. Price: $24.95.

22. Aveda Corp./Estee Lauder Cosmetics Inc. ( offers natural and organic make-up, skin, hair and body care. For a twist, try Aveda’s Petal Essence Cheek Tint which is a swivel-up cream blush that comes in a tube. Key Ingredient:
Jasmine: Increases skin elasticity. Price: $22.00.

23. Lavera Naturkosmetik ( offers 100% organic cosmetics and skincare. One of their most sought after products is the Rose Skin Liposome Face Mask which is a hydrating revitalizing mask for dry and mature skin. Key Ingredient: Mango Seed Butter: Softens, protects and renews skin damaged by sun or wind. Price: $7.50.

24. Aromaleigh ( offers natural mineral cosmetics and aromatics. One of their most popular items is the 25% Vitamin C Serum which is an oil-free serum that exfoliates, firms, moisturizes and protects the skin. Key Ingredient: Vitamin C: Stimulates the production of collagen which is the connective tissue that holds the body together. Price: $35.00.

25. Everyday Minerals ( offers 100% all-natural mineral make-up. For a finished look, try Everyday Minerals Finishing Dust which is a powder that sets make-up and controls oil and shine. Key Ingredient: Zea Mays: Contains an anti-caking agent and is a healthier alternative to talcum powder. Price: $10.00.

26. Geografx ( offers mineral cosmetics and natural skincare. For problem skin, try their Fresh Lemon Cleansing Mousse which is a lemon-scented whipped cleanser that cleans oily and acne-prone skin. Key Ingredient: Lemon: Eliminates oil on the skin and is used to treat cold sores. Price: $13.50.

27. Alima Cosmetics ( offers natural mineral cosmetics.
One of their best products is the Nourishing Lipbalm which is a moisturizing glossy lipbalm that is made from natural plant oils. Comes in 13 shades. Key Ingredient: Neem: Nourishing oil that helps skin to retain moisture. Price: $6.50.

28. Angelique Skin Care LLC ( offers natural mineral make-up and skincare. One of their stand-out products is their Cleansing Lotion with Oatmeal which is a facial cleanser that gently washes away oil and restores skin to it’s natural PH. Key Ingredient: Oatmeal: Soothes itchy skin conditions. Price: $13.00.

29. Larenim ( offers natural mineral make-up. For a silky complexion, try Larenim’s Mineral Silk which is a powder that can be sweeped over foundation or bare skin for a smooth and refined appearance. Comes in 3 shades. Key Ingredient: Titanium Dioxide: Full-spectrum sunscreen. Protects against UVA and UVB rays. Price: $24.99.

30. Skin Energizer ( offers natural skincare & cosmetics. For a walk on the wild side, try Skin Energizer’s Emu Oil which is a natural and antibacterial oil that penetrates deep into the skin to shrink appearance of pores. Key Ingredient: Emu Oil: Non-greasy, highly penetrating rejuvenating oil. Price: $14.95.

31. Sheer Miracle, LLC ( offers natural mineral make-up. One of their most popular products is the Mineral Lip Gloss which is an all-natural and long wearing lip glaze that comes in 7 colors. Key Ingredient: Organic Lanolin: Moisturizes and absorbs water. Price: $8.50.

32. Illuminare ( offers natural liquid mineral cosmetics. One of their most versatile items is the Crease Proof Sunscreen Eye Make-up which is a semi-matte eye color make-up that is water-proof and contains SPF 15. It can also be used as an eyeliner and to add color to the eyebrows. Key Ingredient: Methylparaben: Combats bacteria and mold. Price: $18.00.

33. PurMinerals ( offers natural mineral-based make-up and skincare. For a thorough face cleaning, try Mineral Mudd with Pascalite which is a facial masque that deep cleans and detoxifies the skin. Key Ingredient: Calcium Pascalite: Absorbs oil and reduces shine on the face. Price: $15.00.

34. Evan’s Garden ( offers natural and organic make-up, skin and body care. For a dreamy complexion, try Evan’s Garden Dreamsoap Facial Cleanser which is a liquid handcrafted soap that cleans and unclogs pores. It comes in 5 different varieties for normal skin. Key Ingredient: Beet Root: Excellent for boils, pimples and pustules. Price: $12.75.

35. Forever Mineral Cosmetics ( offers natural mineral make-up and skincare. All of FMC’s products contain lavender-based aromatherapy. For long luscious lashes, try Forever Mineral Cosmetics Mascara which is botanically-based and lacquer-free. Comes in 2 colors. Key Ingredient: Lavender: Highly aromatic oil that is soothing, calming and relaxing. Price: $13.00.

36. Afterglow Cosmetics ( offers natural mineral cosmetics. One of their best products is their Lip Gloss which makes lips look dewy and shiny while adding moisture. Comes in 7 shades. Key Ingredient: Essential Oil of Orange: Rejuvenates the skin. Price: $9.00.

37. Hemp Organics ( offers organic lip care with hemp seed oil. All Hemp Organics Lipsticks contain certified organic hemp seed oil with natural pigments and plant waxes. Comes in 32 colors. Key Ingredient: Hemp Seed Oil: Has super moisturizing qualities and is a humectant for the skin. Price: $16.95.

38. Suncoat ( offers natural nail polish and organic color cosmetics. One of their most notable items is Suncoat Water-Based Nail Polish which is naturally colored with earth pigments and contains no acetone, alcohol or FD&C dyes. Key Ingredient: Aqua: Protects skin and body from dehydration. Price: $8.99.

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1. I absolutely cannot exercise because:
-I have an I.Q. of 175, and it wouldn’t be fair to have brains and brawn
-I don’t want to look like Lara Flynn Boyle
-I don’t want to perpetuate a Hollywood stereotype that young girls have to live up to
-I want to look like a “real” man

2. I don’t have to exercise because:
-I’m already thin and if I exercise there won’t be anything left of me
-I have superior metabolism
-I only chew one tin of tobacco per day
-I already have lots of energy

3. My idea of  “Warming Up” before a workout is to:
-Go lie under an electric blanket for 15 minutes
-Go sit in front of a fireplace with a good book for 15 minutes
-Go down to the local bar and order a “Boilermaker” and nurse it for 15 minutes
-Go into the kitchen and make a cup of hot chocolate topped off with marshmallows and 15 different kinds of cookies

4. My favorite weight-loss reality tv show is:
-The Biggest Loser
-Celebrity Fit Club
-The Simple Life starring Paris Hilton & Nicole Ritchie

5. I exercise everyday by:
-Walking 12 feet to my mailbox to retrieve the mail
-Skipping 3 blocks down to the local Dunkin’ Donuts
-Jumping up 2 times to use the bathroom during the commercial breaks on the six-o’clock news
-Twirling round and round in my swivel chair for 30 seconds

6. Organic Foods:
-Are made from the organs of humans and animals
-Make a person poop every 3 hours
-Are only eaten by people who have squirrels as pets
-Taste bland and are indigestible

7. The best fashion/exercise moment in history is:
-Richard Simmons sweatin’ to the oldies in Daisy-Duke short-shorts
-Jennifer Beals dancing like she’s never danced before in a torn sweatshirt in the movie, Flashdance
-Jamie Lee Curtis, aerobics instructor extraordinaire, doin’ kick-ass fun-ass 80’s style aerobic moves in her exercise classes decked out in crazy-ass leg warmers and a spank-ass waistbelt in the 1985 campy cult exercise movie classic, Perfect
-Olivia Newton-John sauntering around in the “Physical” video wearing a headband, leotard & leg warmers

8. I can’t afford to exercise because:
-the Air Jordan tennis shoes I need cost $150
-I have to pay for my kid’s college education in 18 years, so I have to start saving up NOW
-I am a member of a one-income family
-Let’s face it, Band-aids ain’t cheap

9. All of the above answers are not only incredibly ridiculous but they are the worst excuses in the world for not exercising and eating properly?
A. True
B. False

10. Excuses will help you lose weight and support your family, mentally and financially, when you drop dead from coronary heart disease?
A. True
B. False

P.S. Tell me the worst excuse you have come up with to get out of exercising?

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